ben now weighs 8 pounds and 10 ounces. I had to have them repeat it several times cause I just couldn't beleive he'd gained that much in just two weeks. he is 21 1/2 inches tall, and in the 25th percentile for height and the 10th for weight. but they do it by actual age, not by gestational age. so, i think we're doing fine.

the night before we went to the doctors he ate every two hours all night long! i thought i was gonna die. i got to the point where it hurt just to look at the daylight.

but, you'll never believe this. last night he slept almost FIVE hours!!!!! and then we were up for an hour and then he slept another FOUR!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

that's right, nine wonderful hours of sleep, almost in a row. we are in a very super mood today!! AND -- get this, -- i was looking at him this morning to see if he looked still hungry, and he was looking back at me, kind of peacefully regarding my face. so i smiled at him. and he smiled back! my baby smiled back at me!!! then i started crying and it scared him. :-) i felt bad but he's gonna have to get used to it.

in other, only semi-baby related news
its almost sunday. i had my doctors appointment this week, and i guess i got a green light. it will have been eight weeks by the time its sunday. that is a very long time. i am very very very very scared. i know that i'm technically healed, but i also know its gonna hurt anyway. the doctor's advice? "try to relax and use lots of lubricant" great. relax. i'll be sure and do that. kind of like the first time? where as much as i knew i wanted to and was actually the intigator and arrager of the whole thing, i freaked out, and cried? like that? oh, and did i mention the searing pain and blood? yup. can't wait.

but at least it will be nice to spend some time with each other. brad and bryna are watching ben, and we're gonna have like a date-shaped thing. out to dinner, hot springs, nice stuff. and its not that i don't feel like i want to ... exactly. ever since the doctor said OK, things have been heating up. earlier today, he kissed me in the bathroom in a way that i probably haven't been kissed in a couple years. like up against the wall leaving me breathless. OK. that's not true.

i mean, it probably hasn't been a couple years. its just that anytime since i was 18, that kind of kissing has always led somewhere. this may sound really strange, but it was nice just to be kissed, ya know? like i was 17 again ...

did i mention i was terrified?
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